It's one of the few agreed upon duties of being a maid of
honor -- you need to throw a party for the bride! Whether it's a traditional
bridal shower, a wild bachelorette party or a little bit of both, as a
bridesmaid it's your job to give the bride an event she'll remember and
treasure. We know that balancing the needs of the bride, her guests, and your
pocketbook can be tricky so we have some steps for you to follow to put on a
great party.
TALK TO THE BRIDE
You may be thinking of a classy
lunch at a country club, the bride may be thinking tequila shots at a bar. Get
together with your bride and find out what she has in mind. Ask her if anyone
else is throwing a party for her. It may be that a friend of her mother's might
want to take the traditional bridal shower while you take care of the girls
gone wild night out. It's also important to ask the bride how involved she does
or doesn't want to be in planning the event. Most brides have enough on their
plate and will be happy to let you take the planning reins, but others have
trouble giving up control.
TALK TO YOUR
FELLOW BRIDESMAIDS
Although the maid or matron of
honor generally takes the lead in planning the shower, the other bridesmaids
usually serve as co-hosts. Planning a party with a group can be more difficult
then doing it single-handedly, especially if you don't know the other girls all
that well. After you've talked to the bride and know what type of event she has
in mind, you should talk to the other bridesmaids. If you're all in the same
location the meeting should be face-to-face, if not, use IM or a conference
call to get everyone together.
SET A BUDGET
As co-hosts, you and the other
bridesmaids are responsible for paying for the party. It's likely that you and
the other bridesmaids will all have different financial situations. Find out
approximately what each host can contribute, and make a budget. Knowing your
budget will help you decide if the party should be held in someone's home or at
a venue, and what food should be served.
If you're having a night on the
town where each girl will be expected to pay for her own dinner and drinks,
your hosting budget should go to the transportation and tip. Hiring a limo or
other transportation is a great idea for a fun night out but it can put girls
who can't afford to contribute, or who need to be home earlier, in a difficult
situation. Group transportation should be optional and should be paid for by
the party hosts, not the guests. Don't forget to think about the driver's tip
when making your budget.
PICK A THEME
If you're having a traditional
bridal shower, having a theme can help you organize the event and make
decisions about food and decorations easier. It can also help guests decide
what gifts to buy.
GET A GUEST LIST,
SEND OUT INVITATIONS
Unless the party is a surprise,
the guest list is set by the bride. For a bridal shower, the guest list should
include her mother and future mother in law as well as any in-town female
relatives. Sisters of the groom or other close female relatives should also be
invited. Only people who are invited to the wedding should be invited to the
shower.
HAVE FUN
All the hard work of planning
the bridal shower or bachelorette party boils down to one thing: fun. It's the
whole point, so don't hold back.
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